Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Ten Ways to Write a Collge Essay

1. Know about the assignment for weeks, even begin research, but wait until the day before it’s due to actually start writing it.

2. Choose a day when not only all four of your children are out of school, but also invite adorable 3-year-old niece and 9-year-old nephew to join the party. Also at different times during the day, open your home to your other nieces and nephews (too numerous to mention & yes, they’re all adorable too) who live in the neighborhood.

3. Make sure your 5 year old is definitely still feeling the effects of a busy Halloween weekend and is generally just a grumpy tale.

4. Add a house that is honestly a WRECK and the fact it took over an hour just to clean the ‘work area’ (which of course had to be moved to a different area due to all the distractions).

5. Catch up on emails, facebook, and twitter to just be sure you’re not missing anything while you’re slaving away on your research paper.

6. Set a time to start essay and stick to it, then change the time due to lunch, almost done cleaning the kitchen, and finally due to another out-of-town niece’s visit (she’s 23 and I loved spending a couple hours catching up on what’s going on with her).

7. Volunteer to bake goodies for the school’s Election Day bake sale. Don’t just volunteer cookies or brownies, offer to make those AND some hot dinner rolls and challah bread for the second shift.

8. Drink a Mountain Dew and eat French fries and nuggets w/ the kids at lunch. Cover your fries in cheddar cheese, sprinkle the fairy dust of the food world on top (if you don’t watch Jim Gaffigan—you should), and then liberally douse with some ranch dressing.

9. Feel miserable about your lunch choice and eat salad for dinner (although go ahead and add all the aforementioned toppings…it helps my mind stay creative).

10. Drink a cup of coffee at 5:30 while soaking in the tub, have a hot chocolate around nineish, and finally another Dew at 11:15. Finish some semblance of the required 750 words at around 12:30, stumble into living room, make son go to bed (he fell asleep watching the Series), watch Jimmy Fallon’s monologue, go to bed. Get up at 7 a.m. and try to figure out what in the world I was scribbling at midnight….oh and have another cup of coffee.

How’s that for an endorsement for going back to school?

Awww..who am I kidding? I am loving it (except the research paper part and the fact I may gain 20 lbs from high calorie beverages...hee hee).
Want more Top Tens head to Oh Amanda's! The list on coffee inspired me this morning.


Blondie said...

i do not envy the 'going back to school' part! Good for you! I will say that Mountain Dew got me through college!

oh amanda said...

AWESOME. That was so fun. And no to the back to school thing! ;)

Thanks for linking up today!

Anonymous said...

Oh Lordy I couldn't imagine writing a college essay with a family & house & all that "adult stuff"!! Glad you're loving it ... and good luck!!

Anonymous said...

I never ever used to be a procrastinator… until I started my Master’s program. I swear, my list of distractions would look nearly the same as yours (especially #1 and #2!).

I discovered that I actually wrote my best when I was under the gun…. Maybe because it is because we have to let the ideas brew in the back of our minds for a bit until we can actually get it all down.

jen said...

Ooo. I like the way onebetamom thinks. She's my kind of procrastinator. One with reason!
LOL @ your post Pam.

Sincerely, Jenni said...

I gave you an award over at my blog today! Congratulations!