I’m missing my boys. That’s all.

I’m in Kingsport, TN with one of my children.  I’ll give you one guess which one.

 

 

You WIN!!!  It’s Olivia. 

But all of my boys are still in West Point.  7 hours away. 

I’m here because I passed my drug test.  (Yay for me never doing drugs!!!)  And I have an appointment for my physical, and then next week I’ll begin orientation.  Soooooo.  It’s official.

I’m a working woman.  Well, I will be. 

And there’s a possibility I’ll get to work nights. 

 

*chirp   chirp*

Really, people.  That would be a good thing.

I belong to the Nightus Owleous genus of our species.  So this would be a to thrive in my own habitat.  Plus, I’m of the opinion that it will be an easier transition from not working.  Patients sleep at night.  There will be stuff to do, but I don’t think I’ll be as overwhelmed on nights. 

Oh.  I forgot to mention this. 

$3 more an hour.  The night differential is a HUGE incentive to do the night shift.

I just wanted to give you an update on the work front.

But.

My husband and sons are far far away.  (Not IN Far Far Away ~Shrek #4 comes out this week!!!) 

Right now I’m poking my bottom lip out.  I miss my boys. 

Liv suggested that I clarify this.  I was including the hubs in “my boys.”  Cutie patootie.  She wanted you all to know that I miss my husband too. 

Anywho, that’s the end of my whine. 

So what’s new with you?

Top Ten Tuesday ~ Goin Back to Work Edition

I am looking at going back to work after 14 years as a SAHM.  My kids are bigger, they don’t need me every second of the day, we could REALLY use the money and it just makes sense.  BTW, don’t you just love my pic?  Cuz, you know, I’ll be bringing home the… you get it, I won’t insult you.

I’ve been looking for a job, and my mother in law has lined up a pretty sweet full time position for me, starting pretty soon.

Here’s the Top Ten issues/fears I have about working again.

1. I will be tired.  I know it will take an adjustment period for me to get used to getting up super early and being super busy all day.
2. I won’t have any free/me time to speak of.  It’s ok.  I just know that as soon as I get home, the kids/hubs will need something and I’ll have to be much more deliberate about carving out this time when I can.
3. I’ll have to wear makeup every day.  Ugh.
4. I will hate that alarm clock.  Guaranteed.
5. I worry about what the weekend will look like.  I know I’ll want to sleep in, but also want to get out and do something fun, but I have a feeling it will be a grocery day.
6. I love cooking from scratch, but I think that will be a little more difficult trying to pull together dinner after work.  Bye bye homemade bread.  (Maybe not.  Hope not.)
7. I’ll have to build up my immune system.  Working in a hospital may mean being sick.  A lot.  Just like teachers.  That first year is rough.
8. I foresee my coffee consumption at least doubling.  Maybe triple?  I usually have 1-2 cups. 
9. I am looking forward to getting to know some new people.
10. Plus, did I mention the $?  It won’t be rockstar pay, but I’m pretty lucky to find something right now, when nobody’s hiring and I haven’t worked in over a decade.

All you working moms, have any tips for me?  As you can tell, I’m a little … concerned.  And you SAHMs, enjoy it!!!  It’s wonderful, and I am thankful that I had all these years to spend with my children. But it is time.  So here I go! 

*This post could be way premature.  It’s just what’s on my mind.  This job is not set in stone, but looking more and more likely.  It’s not tomorrow, but it could be pretty soon.  I’ll definitely let you know when I know for sure!

Link up your Top Ten, or read others at OhAmanda!

 

It’s my brain’s fault.

In 1914, Hans Friedenthal (1870-1943), a University of Berlin professor, warned women that "brain work" could cause them to go bald, while increasing their masculinity, and even cause a beard to grow on their faces, adding "In the future, therefore, women will be bald and wear long moustaches and patriarchal beards." Source: Chewed News.

Well, he had it half right.

I’m just wondering. Is it only me?

About 3 or 4 years ago, I noticed a few stray whiskers on my chin. So I did what every woman who’s not employed alongside the tattoed man would do. I plucked.

Plucking causes irritation and acne. And the older I get, more noticeable little suckers appear. Y’all, I don’t pluck it unless it’s … well, … darker than its neighbors. My hubs accuses me of creating this mess. They come back darker because I plucked them. To this I say “Nay!”

I tried facial wax a few years back and my skin thought it was prom night. Side note: If you had flawless skin at prom, just keep that braggart tidbit to yourself, please. Mmmmkay?

I have not done the bleach. I’m fearful of the same reaction.

I have a theory that somewhere in my DNA makeup lies a latent hairy gene that presents around age 30. I call it the Dormant Wookie Gene, or DWG. Draw that out. Dwwwwwg. Although if it magically sounded like Billy Goat, that would be more apropos. (Don’t you just love that word? Apropos.)

I feel smarter for having used it.

Crap, there’s another whisker.

Maybe I should stop fighting it. Anyone think the female Fu Manchu could break into the fashion world? Yeah, I figured not. So, if you see me and think “That poor teen has to deal with acne AND wrinkles?,” don’t fret. It’s just me. Fighting the fight. I am quite thankful that I’m not bald. So there’s that.

Maybe with all of the memory loss I have lately, I’ll get my baby smooth face back.

*Fingers crossed!

Share! Tips, stories, bearded lady sightings, anything.

Stupid spam (literally)!

Somehow I have been chosen to be the lovely recipient of an advertising email scheme.  Now I get 2 or 3 emails a day from different email addresses (I spam them every time.) 

I don’t know if it was the signing up for coupons, rebates or free samples or maybe filling out surveys.  Imma stop all that from now on.  Some things aren’t worth the hassle. 

But the point of this post is the randomly generated words that are in the body of the email.  If ever there was a true use of the word random, this is it.

Some make me laugh out loud, some just make you tilt your head to the side and make the “whaaaa?” face. 

Here’s a sample of what I’ve been greeted with in my inbox lately.

microscope waif

resplendent creampuff because

YourOldMelodiousnessWithYourMindWithYourselfWithViagraSuperActivePills  (oneword)

finger pilot rhetorical                              and ribbons

mirrors brides   

beyond parking lot

asteroid aboutsomewhat

grand piano behind toothpick because

scythe over

ThanksForReadingThisRandomWhineyPostHaveAGreatDay!

ps.  That last one, I made up. 

Procrastination Friday Extravaganza with a little whine

Y'all know I'm moving, against my will right? And that I have known about this fact for, oh, a good 2 months.
Yeah.
A rational human being would have their home all packed and ready to go, with the exception of what they need to survive the next 2 weeks.
I never claimed to be rational.
My hubs has warned me of the impending crazy rush that will be my life. "You need to just do it, or you'll end up with 2 weeks to pack the house."
I swear the man's a prophet.
Here I am, 2 weeks from the kids' last day of school, and I have packed 10 boxes. (10 out of 200 ain't so bad, right?)
I have come up with all kinds of excuses why I can't get it done.

-I'm depressed about the move and just plain don't want to do it.
-There were a few hot days (without AC) that I couldn't do anything other than sit on the couch under the fan and pretend to be a mannequin.
-I didn't have the proper packing equipment (newspaper, tape, markers, etc.)
-Laundry takes up all of my time.
-I don't want to move, therefore I don't want to pack. Or as Plato said "I dread, therefore I resist."
Did I already mention that one? Oh. Sorry.
It's a big one.

I have hit the place where I'm running out of excuses and time. I have to quit mullygrubbing and just get the thing done. I really thought that the idea of moving would grow on me the closer I got to the big event, but it seems just the opposite is the case. But that doesn't change anything. There are times when you gotta do things you don't want to. Go with the flow, roll with the punches, yada yada yada. ...Bleh.
Soooo.
On that uplifting note, I think I'm gonna put on an audiobook, escape to another world and pack this one up while I forget about it at the same time.
"Denial is a wonderful coping mechanism." as my SIL likes to say.
I agree. Until it gets to the point where you're just not able to deny anymore.
Looks like our waterfront property is starting to perk and will be on the market soon.

Whine whine whine. I need some cheese to go along with all of this.



*PS* Please, please leave funny/witty/cheesy comments & cheer me up. Any quotes from The Princess Bride should do the trick.

I'll start.
Boooo. Boooooo.